You're not my master!
by Kattebutt
Summary: All that is needed to make Alucard insane, set Integras life at risk and making her realise that her vampire isn’t as insane and evil as she thought, is a little red dagger. The Dagger of Memories ooh! AxI.


**Summary: **All that is needed to make Alucard insane, set Integras life at risk and making her realise that her vampire isn't as insane and evil as she thought, is a little red dagger. The Dagger of Memories! And yes…Even more AxI… Sorry, can't help myself… 

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She felt chills on her arm. It was cold. She covered her arms with her hands. The door was in front of her. She grabbed the handle and it opened with a quiet unpleasant noise. The faint light of the candles made the room look cozy, but still spooky. The coffin lied near a wall and on a little table next to, a blood pack was lying and a candle was burning with a small flame. She went to the coffin and kneeled down. She opened the lid and laid her head on the border of the black coffin. The vampire knitted the black brows at the annoying light. She reached a hand down to the pale face and caressed it with her fingers.

"Good morning, my vampire." she said with a calm and pleasant voice.

The vampire yawned, revealing a lot of long white fangs in his mouth. He stretched his arms out of the coffin and let them hang out of it. His eyes were still closed.

"Mmh good morning Master. How come you wake me this early?" he said with an unusually sleepy voice.

"Are you really _so _exhausted? I told you that it was a bad idea with that daytime mission. But there's a thing I want you look at. I thought it would be best if I woke you up when it was still dark." she said, still caressing his cheek. He opened his eyes.

"Hmm well then I should get up now shouldn't i?" he acknowledged and smiled. He started to get up. Integra moved a little to give him space until they both were standing.

"Don't phase with me again. We can walk together." she said and her servant nodded and they went out of his room. "It came in a letter marked with a red stamp saying "Not bomb". Properly from Iscariot. When Walter saw it he freaked out. He began to say that I should throw it away fast. I wonder why. He said that I may not show it to you. But I don't think it's such a big fuss." she said as they walked into her office. They stood in front of her desk. On top of the papers and folders a big letter was lying in the middle of her desk. Integra picked it up and looked at it while she held it.

"And what exactly is in it?" he asked impatiently.

She took his hand and turned his palm up. Then she took the letter and let the content fall down in his hand. It was a small dagger. The handle was of black tree with golden inscriptions. They were meaning something, but Integra didn't understand the language. The blade was red as if it was painted by blood. It was shining with a red shade and it was extremely cold. It was very sharp. Alucard widened his eyes.

"_There's something wrong with this dagger._" he thought. Integra saw him reading the golden letters. He gasped.

"What's wrong Alucard?" she asked worried. His hands were shaking. His breathing became faster.

"Walter was right. It's The Dagger of Memories! You…" he said. His pupils became huge and then his whole eyes became red. They were glowing. He took to his head and covered his eyes. "You need to run! Quickly"

"Why? What's wrong?"

"There's no time! Hurry, run away! I can't stop it!" he said and dropped the dagger. It was glowing. His brows were knitted and his eyes were closed tightly. It became dark for his eyes. And then normal. Like the light was blinking.

"What's happening?"

"**RUN! **I CAN'T… CONTROL… MYSELF…NGH!" he said loudly.

Integra turned around and rushed towards the door. She looked at him.

"NO servant, I wont, I will cure you!" she said and stopped. He stopped his pain cry outs. He looked at her. His eyes were almost normal. The pupils were still huge and there were anger in his eyes.

"Im… Not your servant, human!" he said and grinned a wide evil grin as he walked towards her.

"Alucard stop it." she said and backed away from him.

"And my name is not Alucard. My name… is **Count!**" he said and violently grabbed her wrists and laughed.

"NO! Please Alucard don't do this!" she begged her mad vampire. Suddenly he looked surprised. He was gasping. Then he looked at her wrist and released it. He looked her in her eyes while he backed away. When he was near her desk he turned around and ran towards the window. He were rushing so much that he almost fell out of the window instead of jumping. The glass smashed and he fell out of the window. Integra heard a loud thud as he hit the ground. She heard his gasping while he ran away.

"What the hell happened?!" she asked herself while she took to her head.

The door opened and Walter and Seres came in. Seres were wearing her nightgown. She looked afraid. Walter was wearing his normal clothes and looked just like Seres.

"What have happened? We heard screams." he asked.

"It was Alucard." Integra said. She was sitting on the floor and staring at the broken window. There was blood on it. The dagger was lying on the floor. Walter ran over to it and picked it up.

"INTEGRA! IS THIS THE REASON?!" he asked loudly and looked at her in frustration.

"Yes im afraid so. Im sorry Walter." Integra said. "But before you do anything, please tell me what this thing has done to Alucard."

Walter sighed.

"Very well. This is The Dagger of Memories. It is made to send a vampires mind back to its past. Alucards past is much unknown and therefore we don't know much about it. But he has obliviously been sent back to a time before Hellsing owned him. When he was a free vampire." he said.

"But suddenly he stopped and looked surprised. Do you know what might have happened?" she asked.

"Yes I think so. That must have been the **real **presentAlucard, trying to fight his past. He must have realised that it would be too difficult and then escaped instead, to prevent his past from hurting you. But it was only for a short moment he was there and now he must be back with the mind of his past. Did you say anything to him that might have made him upset?" he said and then crossed his arms and looked at Integra.

"I called him "servant". That might have made a free vampire upset." she said burying her face in her hands and sighing. Her head were acing.

"But there **must **be some sort of antidote, right?" Seres cut Integra off. "Master can't stay like this forever!" she said desperately.

"Im afraid no, Miss Seres. This spell has never been meant to be able to be stopped. But if we are lucky Alucard might have the ability of fighting his past and be normal again. Unfortunately this chance is very small, by the fact that the past Alucard was stronger than the present Alucard. If he tries and doesn't succeed he might kill himself instead. But that is almost not possible. Until then, we need to protect you. If you see him then we must protect you at all costs. Allright Miss Seres?" he said and pulled three almost invisible strings out.

"Yes sir. But then I need to train very often if we are going to confront Master." she said and made a salute.

"Of course I will inform the soldiers about the situation then. Will you please guard Sir Integra then?" he asked the young vampire in a purple nightgown.

"Yes Walter." she said with a nervous smile.

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A week had passed and no one had seen anything to Alucard. Some of the missions had been his work. He had been feeding a lot and left the bodies behind just to let them turn into ghouls.

"You're back again. You must have been fast. Were there fewer ghouls?"

"Yes Sir. Actually there were only a few. It makes me nervous. Master could have stopped feeding and be on his way here by now. Im sorry Sir, im just nervous." Seres reported.

"Im sure that he wont come back. Im afraid that we will never see him again. Remember he think he is a free vampire now." Integra said with a sad voice. It made her sad to think about Alucard being that free vampire without limits. Without hesitation.

"Yes I have thought of it too." she said and looked down.

"Very well Officer Victoria you can go now." Integra said and started on her paper work.

"I will. You're sure that you won't need protection tonight, Sir?" Seres asked. Integra nodded and Seres left the office.

Integra was alone. She was done with her paper work. The last paper was a blood pack bill. She stretched her arms. It was getting dark. She went outside her office. Heading to the back door. On her way she met Walter. He had a teacup in his hand. "_Properly for me._" she thought.

"Why good evening Sir Integra. I was just on my way to give you a cup of tea. Where are you going if I may ask?" he said and handed her the tea.

"I'm going to the garden. But I'm very tired and I'll go to bed soon. Thank you for the tea, it was very kind of you." she said and nodded thankfully.

"Im glad you appreciate it, Sir Integra. Goodnight." he said and bowed.

She got to the glass door. It was not warm. It was in the middle of spring. The flowers were blooming and everything was green and fresh. It was totally dark now. But the garden was still as beautiful as always. She sat down on a bench. She was happy that she was wearing her suit. It was actually a little cold. The garden was big and in the end of it trees were making a circle around the whole garden. On the other side of the trees were The Wild Geese's shooting range. But they all had gone to bed. The last time she saw Alucard was once when she saw him in a dark alley. He saw her too and hissed loudly. He was still angry with her. It grieved her to see him like that. Seeing him reach the bottom. Killing innocent people. That was when she realised that she wouldn't get him back.

She sighed.

"_We can't capture him again. Maybe the present Alucard will kill himself to free the world of himself, before the past Alucard takes fully control over him_." she thought.

A bat came flying towards her. Integra liked bats. They were charming and somehow cute, she meant. It stopped and hung itself on her finger. It screeched. Integra smiled. Then another one came. It did the same as the first. Then two more came and yet again they hung themselves on her other hand. But then a hundred of bats came flying towards her. They flied around her and screeched. Then they flied back and disappeared. A silent laugh was coming closer. She saw a shadow. She saw the coat and the long loose hair. The coat was torn and ripped apart. She saw red eyes shine in the night. But only the red dots from the irises. And then the toothy grin. The laugh got louder as he moved towards her.

"Alucard." she addressed the shadow, whispering so quietly that even Alucard could not hear it.

"Well look what we've got here. The little Miss Hellsing. I've heard a lot about you lately. Killing my kind! A dying race! Do you still think im mad at you only because you called me "servant"? No that's not all I got to hate you for. So what should I do to you, now when you have no protection?" he said.

"You can't kill me! The **real **Alucard is still in there. Do you think he would allow you to kill me?" she said fearlessly. She stood up and looked him in the eyes. He started to laugh louder.

"Oh yes I rather think he would. Have you ever thought of how much he wishes to become free? And how it feel's to be captured against his own will? I know how it went for me later in my life. And I won't be doing the same mistake twice."

She felt a chill down her spine. Was it true that Alucard would allow his past to kill her? Did he really miss his freedom so much? The vampire started to talk again. It seemed that he was enjoying telling her all this.

"Yes that little future me is getting weaker. He is pretty easy to manipulate when he is tired. And he told me how he was captured. And im afraid that will make it even more impossible to capture me!" he grabbed her wrist and pulled her closer. "Fortune ably for you I'm not the raping type. I'll just torture you instead!" he said, laughing manically.

"Arg STOP IT! Alucard I know you're in there please come out!" she begged and tried to get away.

"HAHA, what is the worst I can do to you? How can I make you suffer as much as possible?" he said loudly and shoke her wrist. His grip was hard and it hurt her when he shoke it violently.

"It's too late! You hardly can't make me suffer more than I already are." she said and got free of his grip. He looked surprised and angry.

"You're lying! Im a monster! I'll always be! Forever and ever. And no one will ever care about me. **EVER!**" he yelled at her back while she ran towards the woods around the mansion. If she ran into the house he would kill everyone in there.

"_I might be able to use this against him. But how? This Alucard seems stronger than **my **Alucard._" she thought. She saw him get closer. "Why the hell did I run into the woods. The people inside is also there to protect **me.**" she thought as the hid behind the trees.

"Come out, come out wherever you are." she heard him say almost like singing. "Come out and let us play a little." He got closer to her. She knew he was going to kill her. She would get killed by her own vampire. "_There is no way back. Alucard is too weak to take control again. And we can't even stop him. NO it can't be like this._" she thought and started to sit down behind the tree. She could hear him come. She could hear the leave's crisping sound of being crushed under his feet and she heard his creepy humming.

But suddenly he stopped and started to gasp. She heard him scream in agonizing pain. She looked from behind the tree and saw him on his knees, bending his back backwards with his hands covering his face only revealing his wide opened mouth in a scream that showed a long row of his pointy white teeth.

"AAAAAARG STOOP IT YOU IDIOT! YOU'LL KILL US BOTH!!" she heard the vampire scream. She felt a strange feeling of relief and confusion. She had a faint idea of what was happening.

"AAARG! NGH, MASTER! IT'S ME! BUT ONLY FOR A MOMENT! I'M STILL HERE, DON'T GIVE UP! **RUN!** I CAN'T STOP IT! RUN**AAARGH**!" she heard the vampire scream. He bowed his back forward and he were shaking like if he was in cramps, and holding his head. Blood dripped from his nose.

Integra started to run. It was horrible. Even if she got far away from Alucard, he would still find her and kill her. This only gave her a bit of time. She got out on the other side of the woods. She could still hear his screams. But then they stopped. A sign of that the past Alucard were back. She heard his anger cry outs and the curses for her servant. And then he started to laugh again.

She got to a little house. It was there the soldiers had their spare weapons. She grabbed a dagger and a baretta. She knew she could not kill him, but it could maybe give her some more time to get away. She would not hesitate to shoot him. She had done it at least a hundred times just to punish him. A bat came flying again. It did the same as before, but this time she grabbed it and twisted its neck. She threw it at the ground.

"Well that wasn't nice, my little friend." she heard a voice. From the bat. A shadow flew out of the dead bat and the vampire who was hunting her formed in front of her. When he was totally visible the bat vanished. The coat was not torn anymore and his hair was its normal length. Integra backed a little away. She stabbed him with the dagger and then began to run again while shooting him in the head. He got up too quickly, she thought. He rushed towards her. Now there was no more to do. But she would not resign. He grabbed her neck with both of his hands. She fell backwards and hit the hard cold ground. He landed on top of her. He grabbed around her wrists and pushed them down to the ground.

"I think I'll bite you. Or I'll strangle you. You decide. The future me told that you have very delicious blood. Should I give it a try?" he tried to scare her.

""Alucard come out! Please." she begged.

"HAHAHAA I almost feel sorry for you. The one you're calling for is inside me and he is too weak. The little chitchat you had, costed him too much energy. I can feel him lying inside me. Yes I can feel him breathe slowly. I can feel him suffer. So deplorable. So grievous. **I **can start over again, and undo my failures. The one, who is lying inside me, evaporating, was just a mistake. Something I can undo now. But you can't." he stopped and laughed as he saw Integras expression. She looked horrified and guilty. And she felt the same. "Oh now I see. It's your fault that this happened! Shame on you." he said with a mocking voice and raised a finger.

"OH SHUT UP! YOURE JUST SAYING THIS TO WEAKEN ME! BECAUSE YOU WON'T ADMIT THAT OUR LITTLE 'CHITCHAT' TOOK A LOT OF **YOUR **ENERGY TOO! AINT I RIGHT?" she yelled. "By the way, I care a **lot **of the present Alucard. Im sure he feels the same. Aren't I right Alucard?" she said. She heard a silent laughter. There was no answer only the laughter. The voice came out from somewhere. It sounded like it came from the sky. Out from the dark clouds that was forming on the sky.

"I am the real Alucard! The real No Life King! A servant of Hellsing. And you are just a memory of mine, trying to steal my body. I might be weak, but I have taken your energy too. Now what will you say to a little fight. The winner takes it all!" the voice said.

"Im in! But first I'll kill your little friend here. She has been dying to see you be defeated by me, but in order to weaken you I'll just kill her now!" the vampire said up to the sky. He punched her so hard in the face that blood came out of her mouth and nose. It became darker and darker. She felt dizzy. Somewhere she could hear the voice from the sky yelling something, but she didn't hear what it was. Just before it became totally black for her eyes she heard the past Alucard scream in the fight of Alucards body. Then she fainted.

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A faint light hit her eyes. Pleasant reddish light. The sun was rising. A sudden feeling of pain and panic came to her. She suddenly remembered what happened before she fainted. She was alive. A good beginning. She took to her head and looked at her hand. There was blood on it. The screams were still there. Had they been fighting each other the whole night? She closed her eyes. There was nothing she could do to help him. Then she heard the scream fade. Then there was just gasping and then nothing. Who won? She looked at the vampire standing on the ground. She couldn't see who it was. The past or the present. Then he felt to his knees, then fell on the stomach and lied still. With his head facing hers. His eyes were closed. She heard no breath.

"Alucard? Is it you? Are you alive? **Please** don't be dead. **Please!**" she begged while she lied and looked at him.

Then he suddenly opened his eyes. Only a little. She could only just see the faint scarlet red colour in his eyes. But she could see that he looked at her. His skin looked almost greyish. He looked very tired. Exhausted.

"I-Integra, I did It." he said and smiled a tired smile. His breath was rasping. Blood were dripping from his nose, mouth and eyes. He closed his eyes. Integra reached out and wiped the blood away. She carefully let her fingers through his hair.

"Good. Let's get you inside and into your coffin. You don't look so well." she said and started to get up. But he didn't move. He was still breathing. But he closed his eyes.

"No you don't Alucard. Do you know how much danger you have put me in? And then you just lie down to die?" she said with a bit of anger in her voice.

"No, no don't worry. Im just… so tired. And starving too." he said and opened his eyes a little again. His breathing became faster. He started to move. He mourned. It looked like it was hurting him to move. At last he got up, but it seemed to be difficult to keep standing, plus that his body was still acing. He winced at the pain and knitted his brows.

Integra hit her forehead. How stupid she was. "_How many times hasn't he helped me when I was in pain? And now I just stand and look at him while he struggles of getting up, fighting the urge to scream at the biting pain. AND STILL I JUST STAND HERE LOOKING!?_" she thought and winced at her stupidity. And then she rushed to him and slipped an arm around him, under his arm. She laid his arm over her shoulder and held it there. He sighed in relief. He smiled and closed his eyes. He was limping. And he was panting at every step he took. He felt weak. He almost didn't walk himself and just let Integra do the work.

"_I'll just get him to bed now. I can see he is about to faint. So I have to get him inside while he can still walk. Arg he's heavy like hell!_" she thought. She was surprised that he didn't read her mind. He must have been too tired, she thought.

"By the way, you haven't got the medical blood yet have you? Im starving to death." he asked quietly. He kept his gaze at the ground.

"I've seen you eat pretty much in the time you have been gone. Didn't you get energy from that?" she asked and looked at him. She couldn't stop frowning at his condition.

"To be honest, I haven't. It wasn't me who gained energy from the blood. It was the one who was controlling my body. That was why it took me so long to get him away. I needed to "drain" his energy by taking away his self confidence."

"I understand. How did you do that? I thought your past was so much stronger than you. What did you tell him that destroyed him so much mentally?" she thought and looked surprised at what he just said.

"I told him about our relationship. I maybe put a little extra on the story. You see, I have never thought that anyone would ever care of me or like me. I have always thought that I was just an uncontrollable monster no one could love. And I hated the feeling of love and friendship. I hated the word. And I hated the thought of being loved. So all I had to do was to tell him that you care for me. And then he freaked out. I knew he would, because I am him and he is me. So I knew that he would do that, because I would have done that when I were him that time."

Integra thought about what he said. Everyone had always seen him as a monster no one could like. A heartless killer. An unstoppable assassin. And a mad murderer. But now Integra saw that it was not the only Alucard. Alucard had the chance of being free. Just let the vampire kill Integra and then take over his body again and then be free. But he didn't. He saved her and even set his own life at risk. She had always admired his courage, but the heart of his had always been a mystery. A thing that couldn't possibly exist. But then her servant cut her off and talked.

"I don't think we should talk right now. Im very tired and if I shall have enough energy to walk with you before I can't do it anymore, I can't spill my energy of a conversation we can have another time. And **you **need rest too. You have had a hard night and I haven't been very nice to you. Were almost home too… so… we…" he said. He stopped his sentence and bowed his head.

"Oh bloody hell... Well luckily we are just outside the mansion and he was right anyway. Now I just need to…" she yawned and continued to talk to herself. "… get down to the cellar and get him to bed. Walter must be awake and I bet he will freak out if he sees Alucard like this."

She got inside and saw Walter in the kitchen. She rushed through the mansion to prevent Walter from seeing them. She got down to the cellar. It was cold as always. She could see the light of the candles in Alucards room. Walter used to light the candles in Alucards room from time to time. A deal they had when Walter had complained of the darkness in Alucards room once he came in with blood to him. Walter dropped the blood and got angry. It was then they had the deal. Even though Alucard was not happy with it.

Integra opened the door and the same unpleasant noise came again. The lid of the coffin was open and a candle was burning on the little table next to. But there was no blood. The people who should deliver the medical blood were late and Seres was starving too. But if they were lucky it would come in the evening. She kneeled down next to the coffin. Alucard lied with his head on her lap. His eyes were even more closed than when she woke up outside. She could not see if it was because he had fainted or were just very tired. Awake or asleep. She could hear him breathe slowly and relaxed. He still looked worn off.

She placed him in his coffin, laid her arms on the edge and placed her head on them. She looked at her vampire. He opened his eyes a little more. He looked at her. His skin was still the strange greyish colour. And his red eyes were not scarlet red as they used to be, but a dull red colour. And his breath was still rasping. He needed blood. If he had walked around without blood for over a week and not gained energy from it, it was only natural that he looked this bad. He closed his eyes.

Integra found a little knife in her pocket. She used to clean her nails with it. She took of her left glove and cut a small cut in her forefinger. The blood rushed out and dripped on the floor. She used her other hand to open his mouth and turned his head to face hers. She kindly scratched his chin with a nail to wake him. It didn't work. Then she carefully grabbed his shoulder and shoke it. Then he woke up. He looked at her.

"Master I'm tired and I need rest. You know that, please don't wake me. I need to sleep until we got blood. So why are you waking…" he said with a stack voice. He stopped as he smelled he sweet smell of pure virgin blood. "You got blood?! I thought there was no more." he asked her and mourning he tried to get up. But Integra laid a hand on his chest and pushed him down on his back again.

She opened his mouth once again and laid her right hand on his forehead, to prevent him from getting up, and held her left hand over his head. The blood dripped down in his mouth. He smiled, closed his eyes and sighed. She saw the colour come back in his face and when he opened his eyes again, to see if she had lost too much blood, she saw the crimson red colour in his eyes again. But he still looked as tired as before, and Integra knew that he still needed to rest. He could live without the blood until they got it, but what she was doing was more a sort of reward instead. And Integra was still so happy to know that he was alive and back that she wanted to make him feel better. She knew that he had never tasted blood which tasted better than hers. He had told her too many times. The last time he said it she had planted three silver bullets in his forehead. And another in his mouth. Somehow she liked to shoot him there. And he always used to grin at her before disappearing.

Alucard started to reach out for her hand. His eyes were showing his bloodlust. Integra grabbed his hand and poked a few times to his forehead. Then the bloodlust disappeared and he laid his arm down again. Even though he was the most powerful vampire, he didn't look much like it at the moment. He knew that she wouldn't give him more blood and he closed his eyes and mouth. He relaxed and breathed slower. Integra reached out for his head with her hand. Before the hand got to his face he grabbed her bleeding finger. He closed his hand around it and Integra felt a warm feeling coursing through her finger, out in her arm and filling her body. Then it stopped and rushed back in her finger and out in Alucards hand again. She looked at her finger. The wound was gone. She smiled and continued reaching out for his face. His eyes remained closed. One of her fingers brushed over his cheek and he smiled.

"Thank you, my Master." he said still with his eyes closed.

"You're welcome, Alucard." she said. He sighed silently in pleasure. She could feel him falling asleep.

"Goodnight, my vampire. Goodnight, my dearest vampire." she said and went out of his room to get some sleep herself.


End file.
